I’ll be the first to admit–screens play a big role in my day-to-day life. I’ll also pat myself on the back by acknowledging that my screen time has decreased since having a baby.
Some may say, “well, of course it does, life is busier now than it was pre-child”. And while I would concede that to a point, there are times, particularly in pre-crawling and walking phases, when I was so bored that I could imagine myself jumping in front of a car to add some spice to life.
And I knew this going into fatherhood. That’s because a friend gave me some a kernel of wisdom right before my daughter was born–babies do NOTHING for the first year. Boy, was that spot on.
It’s a whole bunch of crying, shitting, pissing, milk spilling, and wondering why the decision was made to go through it all voluntarily. That’s a long winded way of saying this is 2024 and you will absolutely have your phone out as you try to kill a few minutes, hours, or yes, the occasional day.
But once my daughter started moving, I knew it was only a matter of time before she started recognizing the things I was doing. So I’ve drastically cut down the amount of time I’m staring at a screen while I’m in her presence. Why? Because I always judge the jerkoffs letting their heads dangle for hours a day watching whatever the Chinese communists port to their handheld computer. It would be awfully tough to judge if I was doing the same damn thing.
I have always been motivated to not be a loser. And I definitely don’t want to be the kind of loser or have the kind of family who goes out to a restaurant and pays for the expensive Joe Biden inflation meal with a whole bunch of phone staring in between.
Seriously, the next time you’re in a restaurant look at the parents staring at their phones while their young or even teenaged children are sitting next to them. It’s pathetic and sad.
And to make it even worse, these mouth breathers are purchasing iPads or other devices for their kids that may only be as young as three years old. What the fuc* is going on right now? What is the point of having children if the rare amount of time you have with them is just spent watching inane videos, looking at Instagram photos of celebrities, or worse, tweeting about liberal politics? I’ll wait.
The example that seemingly the majority of parents set for their children is, at best, embarrassing and, at worst, setting them up for a future dominated by loneliness, poor values, and a generally wasted life.
And I’m not sitting here acting like I should be put on the track towards sainthood. My good lord knows all about my sins, but one those sins will decidedly not be wasting the time I get to spend with my daughter and future children by staring at a screen or allowing them to stare at a screen.
But this isn’t something new to me or my wife. Forget about kids for a second. The next time you dine out, look at the couples sitting across from each other who, outside of ordering their food, go mute until breakfast, lunch or dinner is placed in front of them. What a miserable existence with the person you’ve committed your life to. As I sit here thinking about it, I’m curious if these same people a) are fuc*ing and b) if they are fuc*ing, does their phone play a role in it?
And the funny thing is that the parents of the parents (Boomers) who are currently accentuating this behavior are the first ones to bitch about Generation X or Millennials. How about you people take a look in the mirror before asking why the nuclear family is crumbling or the generations immediately succeeding are so fuc*ed?
But it’s easy to point fingers and blame other people. It makes it seem like we’re not wrong. And since everyone else is doing it, you probably think that you’re doing a fine job. Of course, that’s not exactly a winning formula if you are trying to raise children who are accountable for their actions. But based on how youth sports are going in this country, I would doubt most adults could spell the word “accountable”.
I actually posted something similar to this on Reddit a few months ago. The reaction was predictable. A whole bunch of “fu*k you” in a variety of ways, mixed with “you don’t know everyone’s situation”, followed by old reliable, “who are you to judge?” The classic, “I’m unhappy with the way things are going, so I’ll lash out at the person calling me out on my shit.”
I have come to learn that “parenting” and “sacrificing” are essentially the same thing. Handing over an iPad to your toddler who can’t even read yet is not parenting. I wish I had something pithy to call it, but I don’t even know how to describe it besides “bullshit”.
I refuse to be a part of the problem. Will my kids have iPhones, iPads, Xboxes, TVs, computers, etc. in the future? Absolutely. I want them to be a functioning part of society and it would be seemingly impossible to grow, learn or make a living in anything without a firm grasp of technology. But I can assure you that no one will ever see my kids at a restaurant holding a cell phone or tablet in front of their face while I’m there.
I can even envision a couple questions that may come after one of those unaccountable parents reads the previous paragraph. “What if my kids are terrible inside restaurants?” or “Aren’t I entitled to some peace and quiet while enjoying a meal?” To the first question: be a better parent or sacrifice by not going to restaurants. To the second question: no, you’re not, especially as a parent.
Put your fuc*ing screen down, take the iPad away from Billy and Gracie, and be a parent. Communicate with your kids. Set an example. Sacrifice. Be better. Your kids are counting on you.
