Last night, I was ready to give out some fire. So I went onto Reddit and visited the Dad’s subreddit. The title of the post is, “what is so hard about being a decent Dad?” The gist of the post is that if you are a person who keeps your baby out late at night then you’re a bad parent. Predictably, the keyboard warriors brought out their knives for me.
*note* This article is not targeting those who work irregular schedules. Obviously, an irregular schedule will necessitate an irregular way of managing your child’s sleep.
Good Parenting Is A Hot Take
I’ll be frank—I just don’t care about what most people think about me. Particularly a group of mouth breathing ‘dads’ pecking away at the keyboard with a mix of Cheetos and Bud Light in their systems at 11:30 pm on a Monday after they just got home to put their newborn to sleep.
If you are a person who willingly puts your wants ahead of the basic needs of your child then, at best, you are a bad parent. This includes keeping their baby out late at night so that they can watch a movie, eat dinner, go to a bar, etc. Period. End of story. Facts don’t care about your feelings.
Now, this is to not suggest that parenting is easy or that I am the authority on how to do it. After all, I have a seven month old daughter. However, these seven months have taught me a lot.
Sleep For Babies Is Kind Of Important
If you’ve been a parent for at least seven months then you know that basically the two most important things in your baby’s life are sleep and eating. After all, for the first year of life babies average anywhere from 12-16 hours of sleep per day. And for the first several months the majority of that sleep is not consecutive.
Hell, I didn’t realize that from birth to the second birthday, children spend more time asleep than awake. I wonder why that is? It’s probably because sleep is important.
Sleep is important because, as this article highlights, “an enormous amount of physical and mental development happen during sleep.” Quite literally the brain is developed and strengthened during this time.
The Power Of Sacrifice
Going back to parenting being difficult—it’s true. The newborn stage with my daughter was quite literally the most stressful and trying time of my life so far. It is no coincidence that a lack of sleep contributed greatly to it being such a monumental struggle. However, we survived.
But certain aspects of that time, like a cranky baby who isn’t sleeping well, can last even when she isn’t technically a newborn anymore. However, my wife and I were determined to make sure that wasn’t the case. So, we sacrificed.
For those wondering, especially the people from my Reddit post who have visited my site (thanks for the traffic), sacrifice is defined as an act of giving up something valued for the sake of something else regarded as more important or worthy.
Before kids and even while pregnant, my wife and I enjoyed going out to restaurants at 8:00 or 9:00 before seeing a 10:00 movie at our local theater. It was always annoying when newborns/infants/toddlers would be crying, whining or flat out screaming. We always wondered why the parents just wouldn’t make them be quiet.
Then, after some basic research we realized it’s not the kids’ fault. It’s the fault of the dipshit parents who had their two or three year old out at 10:45 pm to watch the latest Marvel movie!
We were determined to make sure that we weren’t those dipshit parents.
So Why Do People Keep Their Baby Out Late At Night?
The answer is quite simple—we currently live in a society that encourages getting what you want the moment you want it. Delayed gratification. What’s that?
My first mistake on Reddit was thinking that commonsense would prevail. However, in the midst of a 31% upvote rate, and after being told I’m a ‘cunt’ and to ‘get fucked’, I realized that, at least on the internet, I’m in the minority. And I couldn’t be happier.
Whether it’s sports gambling, approval for reality TV, liking Taylor Swift, or non-expert internet opinions, I rarely want to be in the majority. Why? Because the vast majority of people are morons.
No matter how much is written or studied about the importance of sleep for children, in today’s society the most important thing is being able to do what you want, when you want to do it. Kids be damned. It is why we now have a population more interested in viewing TikTok videos than virtually interacting with each other cordially.
What Can We Do About It?
Pray for the babies who drew the short straw. I mean seriously, what is there to really do about it? Parenting has been on a steady decline ever since society deemed two full-time incomes an imperative to do fancy and extravagant things like buy a home, own a car, pay for college or start a business.
As far as your own kids are concerned, give it everything you have to give them the best shot possible to succeed in life. Fortunately, (or unfortunately depending on how you look at it) with my post somehow being considered a “hot take”, if you just put your kids to sleep at a normal hour and allow them to get the sleep they need, they’re already ahead of the curve.
These parents projecting on the internet are likely the ones that will also put their one year old in front of a TV screen for hours or even buy their two years old an iPad to allow and ensure screen addiction kicks in really quickly. It’s a sad state of affairs.
It’s Easy To Not Be A Bad Parent
It might be difficult to be a good parent, but it is certainly easy to not be a bad one.
What I would consider my success in parenting so far can really be summed up in one word—sacrifice. Would I rather spend my money on ‘fun’ things instead of diapers and baby wipes? Of course. If I had my preference would I choose to spend my time watching a football game than getting spit up on? Is that a serious question?
My wife and I decided to have a child. By doing that we made a commitment to put her needs before our wants AND needs. The most basic sacrifice we could make is not to keep our baby out late at night. It’s a shame that, at least on Reddit, that is somehow a fringe opinion. But I’ll be on there more and more to push back against the bullshit and continue garnering traffic for this site.
Stayed tuned for more!
